In order to do you, you might push your husband to loneliness, which eventually will lead to far more serious issues than now. Mine said I was making a spectacle of myself while in an induced labor with back to back contractions. We called to tell him to come immediately. 5. When my DH was starting up his business last year we were going through huge financial stress he would often have 2-3 beer over a day. Here are 10 ways of dealing with an alcoholic husband: Wondering how you should be dealing with an alcoholic husband? Most nights he drinks to the point of stumbling, and not . What will you do if you're away or home sick but the baby needs to go to the ER at night because there is something serious going on? We got to the hospital at 5 pm. She thought it might go away. My husband was incensed and, since he was standing next to my head, diagonal from the doctor, he leaned across me and said, gritted teeth, you will get my son out of my wife without hurting him or her any further or we will OWN THIS HOSPITAL, you fucking stupid bitch. 26 years of marriage has taught me to make sure she is comfortable and has what she needs first and to be honest about what I need. I know the baby could come anytime now but I can't really worry too much about it or it will just make me worry more. Obviously if I am in labor I will not be driving myself but I am sure once we get closer to my EDD then he will slow it down. So I drove the 40 minutes to the hospital solo. Home Depot arrived to install our oven shortly after my water broke we made it to the hospital 5 hours later, had a beautiful 17 hours of labor and he left cause he couldnt get any rest. This is not an average, it is the maximum recommended amount for any given day. I guess you were right. You think? When I called him an hour later because I was 9 centimeters he said he was at Sams buying Tupperware. She just had another baby and he quit drinking 4 weeks before her due date just to be safe. This is YOUR own husband being an alcoholic. All for a free parking spot!!! 7 min read. ).Seems this would not be good even after the baby is born. Fine. Im so fed up that I almost want a divorce. I had a hellish time trying to breastfeed my newborn son (turns out he had a tongue thrust issue and didnt latch on until he was 5 weeks old ) and in the middle of the hospital room, amidst lactation consultants and even a sucking specialist , my husband announces : Honey, let me show you, this is how you do it. but this isn't just within my relationships i'd say it's with friendships and working environment - REALLY envy those that have any guts to say what they feel. At 6am. Labor Story #8: The waiting game (41 weeks / vaginal to C-section) Location: Alexandria, Va. Year: 2013. Thank you! It was one of the biggest events in . Michelle, My husband took a conference call on the way to the hospital. We got to the hospital at 7:30 and I was already pushy. Seriously?? Be an advocate. It is also important to seek professional. My water had broken at 6pm while I was at work, they wouldnt allow me to drive home and the doc said it was too early to come in so I waited over an hour for my now ex husband to pick me up. I sincerely wish you luck this will not be an easy road, but I hope you both find the strength you need for the sake of your baby. With our third i forgot something to wear home and baby outfits so he had to go shopping for me and lets just say men DO NOT know how to shop for women or babies!!! Okay tell me when we need to go so I can shower first, he said. Labor started picking up, but the contractions never developed a regular pattern. However, we did talk about it; and he truthfully would have been so embarrassed to call and ask his mom (or my parents) to drive me to the hospital if need be, because he wouldn't feel comfortable driving. This message, when put right, will force them to be in their best mood despite being overly drunk. husband drunk when i went into labor Home; FAQ; Foto; Contact So say he is out for a work meeting until 6, and he had 2 glasses of wine. It also happened to be the night of our annual street party. I had to be induced. It just would not be a good situation for DH to be drunk in the delivery room. I would be concerned about YH having 5 drinks in one night on a regular basis. Holy fuuk. and my water broke at 2am so I tried calling him to tell him to come back. Thats when the smell of a thousand beers hit me. When I was born my Dad was on a fishing trip. Laughing gas has been widely available for laboring women in other countries, and it's finally making its way to hospitals and . Second, how important is it to your husband that he be at the birth? He passed out in my bed (I was in the chair) and proceeded to puke. When I was in labor with our son my wife was AMAZING, a true hero. He was driving me to hospital in his Mustang Cobra, and we got caught in traffic over a bridge. A few hours post-surgery I started having a strong adverse reaction to the epidural which included profuse sweating, intense itching and hallucinations. If your husband is an alcoholic, make every effort to avoid situations that are triggers for drinking. I think I'm always stopping to prepare for the recipients reaction. This, my friends, is truly a gift. By talking to him about your problems, you will be able to get the support you need to overcome these challenges and move on with your life. He replied that he didnt feel so well. Husband, I swear by my ugly faded hospital gown, I will end you. I told him if I missed my epidural window I would end his life. After 19 hours of back labor and an emergency c-section, my ex went bowling with his parents. Yeah right. They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. After threats, and having my parents call and force him to drive back. I think there should be another thread about crap husands pull after the baby is born. He said that it was probably nothing and I should try to get some sleep. Honestly more hurt that thats more important, then it is funny! Yeah, you know, cause he was the one up since 5 am working on pushing a 10 pound baby out of his body. "Had 'bloody show' for two weeks prior to my water breaking and even lost my mucus plug and NADA! After our first they were sewing me up from some tearing. (Dont even ask about our planning ability! So I stand behind some, I never said all, of these comments are just bitchy. This has nothing to do with "men being stupid". He called the hospital and they said theyd call him as soon as anything happened. It's annoying, but it's not like he sits down and pounds hard alcohol or something. I was on the bouncy ball for a half hour waiting and then went to check on him. My car, my car! he said with horror. OR MAYBE you've been putting it off for awhile and you're doing it because you know you need to stop procrastinating! **They're called first luddz fo' a reason -- mo' is supposed ta come after. my husband decided that my induction, right as the contractions were taking off and I was getting three in a row with no break of even 3 seconds, was the BEST time possible to show my aunt an episode of Firefly. First baby: Yes. I will never know. I know the tone has gotten pretty intense, but it shouldn't interfere with the central message: the behavior you're describing in your husband is binge drinking, and the more often he does it, the worse off your family will be. This isnt going to happen. He doesn't drink that much EVERY night, but it happens, and I just KNOW with my luck, he will drink that much on the night I go into labor. It is mean and very insensitive to the child. Ha, I thought to myself, hell be visiting the bathroom regularly tomorrow. My husband was beyond perfect. I called my husband at work around 6 p.m. to let him know I was in labor with our first and he said hed be home to take me to the hospital as soon as he wrapped a few things up. When we finally got there and I was hooked up to all of the machines, he went downstairs and then returned with a whole pizza that he ate in front of me knowing that I couldnt eat because I was in active labor. Oh, yeah, I am sure he will slow it down. Thank you TokenI think im in love with you! My DH never drinks like that, unless we're headed out for a crazy night with friends (every once in a while) or to a wedding or something. One suggestion was to bring food just in case I delivered in the middle of the night and the cafeteria was closed (everyone said Id be STARVING after delivery). for fear that he would pass out. I mean PISSED. I cleaned the house again. I was two weeks overdue, had been induced and then sent home because nothing was happening. These are hilarious! Oh well, possibly because it was the day before I gave birth to our 3rd child, Jack. 6/20 She Was Playing Bingo When She Went Into Labor. For this pregnant mother, her escape was playing bingo. Third, I would look into more long term plans on how to unwind after a long day at work. With my 1st son, my husband wanted to take a shower before we left for the hospital. I have pictures to prove it. He almost passed out and had his own team of nurses and MY midwife helping him. However, Phil and I are pretty much the masters of the silent fight. We rarely, if ever, have an all-out shout out loud, call the cops, argument. -Katie. I would also say that 5+ drinks make a person more than "buzzed." I went it alone and met up with him after surgery where he was holding the baby smiling, refreshed and relieved. I'm guesing it's pretty important. If men only knew how much pain and exhaustion really goes into labor. My husband has already been given the expectation that the next couple weeks he can't drink all that much (not like he does normally, but he is trying to plan a guy's night this . 8 Signs You Are Married to a Controlling Wife & Ways to Cope, How to Deal With Gaslighting in Relationships in 15 Ways, Narcissist Couples What Happens When a Narcissist Meets a Narcissist, What Revenge Tactics You Can Expect from a Narcissist, 5 Ways to Handle Marriage With a Narcissist Wife, How a Narcissist Changes After Marriage- 5 Red Flags to Notice, 7 Effects of Being Married to a Narcissist Ready Reckoners, 15 Signs of a Histrionic Narcissist in a Relationship, How to Make an Anxious Avoidant Relationship Work: 15 Ways, 15 Signs of Narcissistic Parents-in-Law and How to Deal With Them, 15 Signs of a Clinically Covert Narcissist Husband, 10 Ways to Deal With Your Husband Not Wanting You, 5 Ways to Fall Out of Love After Infidelity, 15 Subtle Signs Your Husband Resents You & What to Do About It, 10 Pros and Cons of Getting Sole Custody of a Child, 10 Tips to spend the holidays when your marriage is in crisis, 10 Reasons Staying in a Marriage Without Trust Is Hard, Treading Carefully: Getting Back Together After Separation, 3 Ways Separation in Marriage Can Make a Relationship Stronger, 10 Things You Must Know Before Separating From Your Husband, 12 Steps to Rekindle a Marriage After Separation, How to Combat the 5 Glaring Effects of Anxiety After Infidelity, How to Have a Trial Separation in the Same House, Feeling No Emotional Connection With Your Husband, How to Get Back Together After Separation, 6 Ways to Tell if Someone is Lying About Cheating, 5 Signs That You Are Living in a Toxic Marriage, 7 Important Tips to Build Trust in a Relationship, 10 Effective Communication Skills for Healthy Marriages, 20 Signs of a Married Man in Love With Another Woman. Then yo ass git a all-expenses paid cruise ta tha Mediterranean n' yo ass git ta hook up Jared Padalecki on tha flight over while bustin yo' jammies. Then, after I finally pushed my baby out (an hour and a half of pushing), he complained about being exhausted. Around 10 am he announces that he has to go home because the Popeyes he ate has given him food poisoning. My brother and father arrived at around 10pm and my brother volunteers to go out and get some food for my husband. I wish men weren't so stupid about some things. Start by selecting which of these best describes you! He would still have had alcohol in his system and in hindsight, a cab or ambulance would have been a better mode of transport. In the throes of that hell my husband turns to me and says, Im about to head out and meet up with the fellas. He will not only miss the labor, but likely years of your child's life due to alcohol related disability or death. With our first child, he made me wait until the show Charlies Angels was done before leaving for the hospital. Help her stay focused and relaxed. I wish you luckI would talk to him now about this habit! However, this might not be a good decision, ever. In the worst case, you would also want to avoid the situation as much as you can. Im not sure where to start with my story and it has been 20 years and fresh in my mind. He needed to get directions to the hospital. Not only is he really annoying when buzzed, which will piss me off and make my pain and anxiety higher, but he can't drive! 08, 2020, 12:03 a.m. NEW! ? Second, that is way to much drinking for a regular basis. I woke up at 2:30 to contractions. Needless to say, when, four weeks later he was resting a pack of frozen peas on his testicles from the vasectomy hed breezily put his hand up for, my sympathy levels were small to non-existent. I had literally lost my mind and was threatening to unhook myself from everything and leave the hospital. I went into labor at 10:30am Saturday morning and, this being my first child, I didnt know it. You know, the stuff you still hold over his head. I think you should talk with him about this (perhaps a counselor as well if talking to him alone won't work? First, would he normally drive after 5 drinks? Professional help might be available via your health insurance if he needs medical assistance due to withdrawal symptoms (which, if he drinks every day, he might) or a specific substance abuse program may even be available under the mental health coverage in your plan. And then I would unleash hell. Needless to say..while gasping for breath, I told him to shut up. He did later apologize. Grab Now! Go figure! The only challenge that arises at that moment is neither your husband needs your help at that very moment nor youre a professional counselor. Sandals and flip flops are not recommended, especially if a situation arises where you may have to go into an operating room. My nurse thought he had the flu. He says to her Oh, the hospital said theyd call me as soon as anything happened As he was saying the words he knew hed made a mistake. At the hospital after the birth of our second child, my husband asked if we could not stay at the hospital because he didnt sleep well there and it hurt his backand, apparently he won that one because we packed up and headed home, where his selective hearing allowed him to sleep through the night from that point forward. Check out this video to understand how to get your alcoholic spouse into treatment: Discuss the various treatment options that are available and find the best one for him so that he can get better as soon as possible. I was in labour for almost 24 hours with my first, and my hubbys mom brought him in a HUGE meal because she was worried hed be hungry while I enjoyed a meal of ice chips. By the way, he would never drive while drinking, he thought it would be completely fine to call an ambulance to take me to the hospital if he's drunk. Jaime Clark didn't feel contractions with her first baby, either. I suppose I should give him credit for being there at least. this is fantastic!! Ive got girlfriends who pretty much just lay it all on the table. It's just that the cumulative effect of 4-5 drinks from 5pm until 10 or 11 makes me worry. I mean he would have just stayed home and played video games, if I had given him the impression that Ill be okay on my own. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. He didnt answer, because he was ASLEEP since hed been working so hard. Also, alcoholic parents have a higher incidence of raising alcoholic children. Be there to offer encouragement for labor and delivery. I hardly knew my now husband of 11 years at the time (though I already knew he was the one!) When the guy on the other end asks so, how are you doing? because he probably heard my whimpering/low moaning in the background, my husband replies well my wife is actually in labor and were on the way to the hospital I think the guy on the phone call was speechless at first, and then smartly ended the conversation so my husband couldI dont know focus on driving through the blizzard and getting his wife to the hospital!?! Here . Posted 6/9/10. Hours later on July 28, Emily Jacobs, a 28-year-old . The worst expectation you as a wife to an alcoholic husband may have is to expect a change overnight. When he finally woke up to go pee, I asked him for some ice chips and he told me he was tired and was just going to go back to sleep. There was a silence on the phone for a moment, and then in a quiet voice Grandma told Dad she was going to hang up and call back in 10 minutes, and at that time she expected a full report. Are there any good books for hubby that explain the importance of truly supporting the wife? Many people told me that being induced would be really difficult, long, and painful. Okayjust to show another sidebecause I love this storywith my third we had some complications and had an emergency c section. And then I was really shocked when talking with an older lady at church who told me she went into labor naturally on Dec. 31, 1964, and the maternity ward was . Get real, people. Ask the medical staff questions. Raspberry Leaf Tea. And often I wonder if this is healthy. This classic, tell-tale sign of labor can appear as a big gush, or it can happen in a slow, light stream. Money was scarce. The birth of our child is not about him, it's about me and the baby. LOL, I love that Firefly episode! My now ex husband left me home to go to army reserves for the day as i labored home alone. He at Popeyes and now she is here yelling bout the fact he ate. One such instance can be when they start behaving rudely under the influence of alcohol. Of course, I couldnt, so about 9 am, I started timing my contractions and they were getting to be about 5 mins apart.